Welcome~ Enter At Your Own Risk~ I Couldn't Make Some of This Stuff Up~ My Experience in Dealing With A High Conflict Baby Mama, Parental Alienation and Just Trying To Get Through This Thing Called Life~
If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?
The N word, I’m sure I don’t have to explain which one- but I will say it’s the one that MANY youth call each other, boys and girls.
It’s a derogatory word and just not nice.
So my daughter and son attended her bio father’s Celebration of Life on 10/1/23. Apparently one of her Aunt’s believes I should have been there, and another Aunt spent her time telling my daughter and her two older siblings what a great dad their father was and how he paid his child support, and that at least I should have told my daughter that, she should know that. Well, SHE knows otherwise, to be honest. She knows about court dates, she even went to at least one just to be able to meet him. That didn’t happen, he didn’t show up. Frankly, I feel that wasn’t the time or place for that kind of conversation, so perhaps it was best I didn’t go.
Later on in the month, around 10/28/23, I took a screenshot of a letter an uncle sent me from back in December 2007 and sent it to Sarah via text. In this letter, the Uncle said that IF he understands correctly, I had put a hold on Anthony’s Trust account. He stated there was only about $2000 left and they had been paying the property taxes for his house with the money. He mentioned the house was being held in a trust until he dies at which time it reverts to his children. The Uncle said that if the property taxes aren’t paid, that Anthony as well as Sarah will lose the house. He wanted to assure me that the money had not and won’t be used for anything other than to pay those property taxes, and that Sarah will eventually benefit. He thanked me for continuing to send them pictures of Sarah, more than her father ever said. For reference, this Uncle was married to one of Anthony’s older sisters.
Sarah sent the screenshot to her sister asking for her and their brothers thought on it. She asked her sister if she felt they should be asking for a copy of the Trust. Her sister was surprised by this letter and the fact that there was a trust as she and her brother never knew about it.
LONG story short, from October 2023 to present, there’s been back and forth text messages and letters, Trustee claiming he’s not involved, to maybe this other uncle is or another aunt is, to the kids receiving a copy of the property tax bill from the other uncle sending it to the kids and telling them, “Your father’s mother left in trust the home where you father and (his girlfriend) lived. This Trust spelled out that upon your dad’s death that the home would go in equal shares to his three children. Do you have a copy of the trust and in case you don’t hopefully we can find our copy and sent it on to you.” He actually sent the property tax bill, showing the other Uncle as the trustee. This Uncle had the audacity to write, “I request that whatever you do with the property that you keep the well being of (the girlfriend) in mind. She loved your father. This year will be very difficult for her emotionally and financially.”
Um, the girlfriend has at least one adult child that could help her out, and more importantly, were was this “consideration” from THEIR FATHER towards them, the kids, over the past 30 years? He never made an attempt to see them. In fact, he blamed me for him losing contact with his two older children, and he accused me of keeping our daughter from him. Truth be told, he lost contact with his two older kids because I was no longer in the picture and their mother was not going to send them to the house anymore. She trusted me with her son, who would come for visitation, and I was gone. In January 2006 I called Anthony and told him about Keith passing away, and how it would be good if he came up to the plate to be there for his daughter. He was all agreeable, but never made an attempt to be there for her or see her, ever. The last time he saw her in person, was when she was 10 months old. At the time Keith died, Sarah was 12, and she was 30 when he died. HIS CHOICES. At the memorial service, Anthony’s girlfriend told Sarah that she recognized her from the pics he received and how she looks like him. That’s the only way I knew he got the pictures.
3 family members, the Trustee, the other Uncle and the Aunt were days away from getting a third letter from Sarah requesting a copy of the trust, this time saying the kids will file in Probate court and ask for attorneys fees and damages and other costs since the Trustee, whomever it is, is in breach of fiduciary duty.
Well, Saturday, yesterday, the kids got word from the Aunt that she has Trust papers and they are going to meet next week at a restaurant to pick them up. Well, THANK GOD FOR THAT! I feel bad for these kids, but at least this is a step in the right direction!
Will write more about this, later 😉
TTFN,
P~
My daughter got home a few minutes ago with one of my favorite drinks from Starbucks, a venti Iced Chai latte with soy and Matcha cold foam. It’s DELICIOUS!
As I was looking at some news online, this came up and I thought I would share. Do you know about “secret menu’s” at your favorite places to eat?
I realize I’m such a creature of habit, I like what I like at certain places.
What do you think?
I would tell my teenage self to stay focused, go on to college and get that broadcasting job you want! I’ll support you in achieving that goal, and I LOVE YOU!
My daughter and her siblings still have not received a copy of the trust their father had for when he dies. She ended up writing another letter to the TRUSTEE and CC’d another Uncle and an Aunt since it’s not certain WHO the Trustee is, even though it lists her one Uncle.
The TRUSTEE was legally obligated to send a copy of the trust and all its amendments to the heirs and beneficiaries within 60 days of the kids father’s death. Well, it’s been since July 24, 2023 that he died, and NADA, NOTHING, ZILCH.
She found the CA Probate Code 16061.7 that states, ” The Trustee of a CA Trust is required to provide all beneficiaries and heirs with a true copy of the Trust documents including any amendments 60 days after the settlor’s death(s) to ensure that all parties involved are well informed.”
My daughter’s biological father died July 24, 2023, and none of his 3 kids have received a copy of the Trust, and this is the SECOND time my daughter is requesting one. This time she CC’d the other uncle and now an aunt because the “Trustee” listed isn’t quite sure who is handling it.
At the Memorial Service of their father, and I say father because he was NO DAD or DADDY to any of the kids, but I digress… one of the aunts made sure to tell the kids that they should KNOW their dad paid his child support, and that I should have made sure my daughter knew that. Her older sister apparently said, “Well, we know differently.” and her sister was right.
Hopefully my daughter and her siblings get a copy of the Trust and all it’s amendments, so that they can move forward.
CRAZY. The “Family” is so concerned about the girlfriend/fiancee of their father and want the kids to consider her because she’s living in the house that THEY inherited, and “it’s going to be difficult for her emotionally and financially.” That is their problem how? The woman has lived in that house, financially free for 16-18 years with their father who, by the way, has had nothing to do with his 3 kids in 30 years. Where was his concern or the families concern for these kids for 30 years? OH RIGHT, he turned his life around the last 10-20 years or so and apparently, that’s all that matters, according to another sister of his.
Just Maddening.
It really made me sad to read this, first thing this morning. I loved his music, I had been listening to country music on my Pandora playlist over the weekend and he was a big part of it.
Just WOW… Anthony has been gone since late July, the beneficiaries STILL have not received a copy of the will, even after asking for one in November 2023. Seems a lot of game playing, wanting to protect his girlfriend and requesting the kids show “compassion” towards her because Anthony died, she doesn’t have money, works a little bit, etc….
Am I pissed off? Yes, for the kids. I know this family protects their own and will do whatever they can to protect their brother/uncle. He had them bamboozled. His sister very recently told me “Anthony made many mistakes but the bottom line is, he has turned over a new leaf and lead the rest 20 years or so in a good and honarable life which is what counts. He did not make good choices in women…“
She should stop bad mouthing the women Anthony chose (his ex wife #1, me and his ex wife#2) and get schooled on the real FACTS of her/their brother/uncle.
He turned over a new LEAF and lead a good and honorable life? Really? I know and his children know differently.
DAMMIT, had I not agreed to accept a payoff amount in child support, that LIEN would probably STILL be in the house and the POWER I could have had.
The executor of the trust says he’s not been involved in awhile due to health reasons. He doesn’t know who is, but it “might be” one of Anthony’s sister, YET, his name is still on the recent property tax bill someone else (an uncle by marriage) sent the kids.
I wish they would stop playing games and give the kids what they are supposed to recieve so they can do what they need to do.
The girlfriend has at least one adult child
Of her own she can go live with or ask for help from. HER well being is NOT the kids responsibility or problem. It’s HER family’s issue.
~This Is My World~ 