Month: March 2000

Keith had been talking and emailing with his kids, since his mom passed away. He told them on 3/11 that he wished they could be there. His daughter wrote him back on 3/13 telling him that she really wanted to come down here, but she “guesses we can’t.” She tells him on 3/15 that she knows that “g-ma will always be in my heart always.” Keith responded to this and explained to his daughter that he wanted them to be here, but that he could not afford to pay half of the expenses. He said he explained that to her mom, and that he also told her mom that if she wanted to pay for the airfare to get the kids there, she could, and he would really appreciate that. He also told his daughter who was almost 14 now, that instead, he got accused of leaving her and her brother out on purpose and of not needing them there to sooth him because he has the family he needs there. He explained that her grandma had family that couldn’t attend and no one was holding it against them, and that no one was accusing them of things that were not true. He told his daughter that he hopes she understood and that he hopes she knows that if he had the money to get them there, they would have been there, and that he was looking forward to seeing them in a couple of weeks.

HIs daughter wrote back that she wasn’t made at him but she was really mad when she heard her and her brother couldn’t come down. “…I was so mad…” she added. She had sent a poem she wanted read at the funeral and the Priest did read it.

The EX then chimes in at 1006pm:

“So sorry to hear you misunderstood my compassion for the loss of your mother. The conversations that took place after you lost your temper were only between you and I. I never told the kids you didn’t want them there or that you didn’t need them.

So your email to (daughter) confused her I never said anything to her about you. I let both kids make up their own minds based on their conversations with you. I never said anything to either of the kids about you. (her name)”

REALLY now? I doubt that, but if it is true, then the saying, “what you do in darkness will come to light.” really shines here.

She just doesn’t stop. on this day at 1:46pm she emailed her response to Keith. She writes:

“So sorry to hear that you are so upset you fail to see that in the event of your brothers passing you failed to inquire if the kids could attend or attempted to get them to visit. It is I who is requesting and inquiring for the kids to attend the funeral. You never mentioned it.

Go ahead that let all your relatives see the e-mails and maybe they will see that I am concerned about the kids being there during this time. And rudeness to even tell us when the funeral is or where it is being held seems rather odd.

More odd is that the e-mails you are sending don’t sound as if you wrote them. (son) and (daughter) have been bothered and upset by the loss of their grandmother and even more upset by attitude with me through your e-mails.

How can you turn this around and accuse me of causing stress when I asked you if the kids could attend and you have never even mentioned the fact that they could or not. You never even brought up the subject. You left them out on purpose because of your other obligations.

I fell that their grandmothers passing was in fact an emergency of a family emergency. Obviously you have the family you need there to sooth you during your loss and you don’t need the kids. They understand.

I don’t understand but like you said who cares about me. I am just their mother. Too bad you feel that I can’t and shouldn’t attend Betty’s funeral. I have thought of her often and now God will be able to share her peace in heaven. may God forgive you all the hate you have inside for others.”

UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE! My mother in law died 3/10/2000, just 4 days ago. Keith has told his ex that he cannot afford to pay for the kids airfare to come out 4 times, BUT he did tell her that if she wanted to pay $356 for tickets (per child) plus any extra expense, she could and he would APPRECIATE it. Why didn’t she do that? Out of the KINDNESS and GOODNESS of her heart? Clearly she didn’t want to. Yet she tells the kids otherwise, blames their dad for all this and tells them their dad doesn’t need or want them there.

THAT is PURE EVILNESS.

Ex was still going on and on about airfare, and attending the with the kids. She can’t be kind or generous and send the kids, by paying the airfare for them, she’s trying to jam him up and guilt him into paying half. Maybe she should use the child support she got to pay for their tickets… just a thought.

Anyway, Keith told her again, that he cannot afford to help pay for the kids expense to attend, no splitting the cost, nothing. He said he wished he could but he can’t. He told his ex he doesn’t need this hassle right now, especially right now. He reminded his ex that his mother just died and he doesn’t need this hassle from her. He told her to not ask again about this issue and he’s told her 4 times already that he cannot help. That was at 1230pm. 4 times in 3 days, WTF is WRONG with this woman!

9 hours later she whips off another email. The subject of this email is (son’s name) and (daughters name) Grandma. She goes on to write:

“Richard, (she started calling him this, or “Dick” which only SHE calls him because EVERYONE calls him by his middle name, Keith.)

More importantly here is the fact that (son) and (daughter) have lost their grandmother. They will not have the opportunity to share that loss with their family as they should. Your rudeness with my concern over the kids and their loss is uncalled for.

This is an emergency and one that could have been organized despite the money so that the kids could attend the funeral. If something were to happen to you would you like to me to say to them that I cannot afford to send them.

I realize that you are not able to afford so that is why I offered to help. Once again you have not said when or where the funeral so that we can attend or send flowers at least.

I knew Betty for over 17 years now and she was always so generous and nice she would want the kids to attend her funeral so that they could be with all of the family during this time. I can still see her when she was still her old self as I never saw her sick and she always wanted her family to get along together and to have peace and love in her home. I know she is without pain and confusion now and now she is with loved ones who left before her. I hope you find the peace that she wanted you to have and that while you share the memories of her with your family you remember her grandchildren who were not able to attend because of money and due to lack of love or caring from (son) and (daughter). May God see you through this, (ex’s name).”

She is HEARTLESS.

Keith wrote her back at 1052pm:

“(ex’s name),

Another important fact is that (son) and (daughter) ALSO lost their UNCLE 13 months ago. They did NOT share THAT loss with their family “as they should” either. Them attending HIS funeral was not an issue. Your TOTAL disrespect to me and my family during this time of loss is COMPLETELY uncalled for.

This is NOT an emergency. The emergency happened when they could NOT revive MY MOM at the nursing home she was in…just minutes before my DAD got there to see her. THAT was the emergency. The viewing and funeral are the AFTERMATH of that emergency.

If you want to send flowers you can send them to my house. My dad is here along with all my other relatives (who, by the way are well aware of your e-mails so far and not appreciating them in the least), and he will be sure to get whatever arrangement you send.

If you want to pay $356.00 for tickets (plus whatever extra fee there is for whatever reason) for the KIDS to attend, an hour and a half service you do that. (I would appreciate it) They can stay here WITH ME of course and they will attend the service WITH ME. I CANNOT afford to spend the money right now, for as much as I would want THEM here WITH ME. YOU, however, are not welcomed to attend. YOU have caused so much stress for us during this time, unnecessarily, it is PATHETIC and SICK! LEAVE ME ALONE, (ex’s name). Keith.”

From the ex at 1130am. Keith emailed her back at 634pm the same day telling his ex thank you, but unfortunately he could not afford to help pay for the kids expense (airfare) to attend.

He told her he would be taking them to the cemetery when they come out for Spring break and they can say their goodbyes. He told her there wasn’t enough time and it’s too expensive for a 24-48 hour turnaround time. He said, “I am sure you can understand this. Thank you for thinking of this though, I appreciate it. Keith”

VERY bad day. The most sweetest, kindest, beautiful woman died. My mother in law. She always had a smile on her face and was so funny! She loved her husband, my father in law, her children, and grandchildren and their families.

RIP Mom, you will be missed.