Summer Visitation 2000

Keith got to see his kids from June 17th to the afternoon of July 22 when their grandmother drove up and took them back to her place in the county of San Diego for her visitation. He was supposed to get them for 5 weeks, but he got them 4 weeks and a day.

So the kids arrived the evening of June 17th around 920pm. We were so excited.

June 18th-It was (stepdaughters) birthday. We went to Church and then to Baja Reef for lunch afterwards. We took her to the mall so she could pick out what she wanted, 2 beanie babies and 2 rings. We also bought her a cake.

June 19th- (stepson) had been complaining about a pain in his toe. he agreed to be taken to the docs. Keith let the ex know that we would be taking him to docs tomorrow.

June 20- Ex told Keith that his issue with their son has come and gone since the first of the year and to please take care of it. He did just that. Then there was a big blowout! Keith and (stepson)argued then (stepdaughter) got involved, and then I got involved. The kids were accusing me of being the cause of all their mom’s problems, her divorce, etc. I told them that this is all their mom sayings, and they said no. They said they didn’t want to be there with their dad and me and our kids. They just wanted their dad. They wanted to leave and were packing their bags so we called their grandma but she was not home. I called the Ex and her that she needed to come down and get her kids or make arrangements to have them picked up. She became belligerent so I handed the phone to her son. She talked to both kids and then to Keith and he ended up hanging up on her. She called back and talked to the kids again. She had her daughter tell us that if SHE had to come down here we would be “VERY VERY SORRY.” GEEZUS, more threats.

The kids continued packing their stuff saying they didn’t want to stay.

Everyone just went to bed. It all started because (stepson) told my daughter, Sarah, that is NOT her brother and she does not know that. He also has a very bad attitude and Keith was tired of it.

June 21st- Keith was off today. He also called in sick for tomorrow due to a family EMERGENCY. We had to call AMTRAK and made a reservation for the kids to go to San Diego. It was apparent that the night before, they had made up their minds they did not want to stay any longer as they had all their stuff packed and was ready to go. Keith told them about 10am to make sure they got ALL their stuff packed because we were leaving at 1pm. They asked where we were going and he told them to the train station that they were heading to San Diego, their grandma’s. He had called her this morning and spoke to her as well. They both told him they did not want to go and they were sorry for what happened. Stepson said he knew it was not right that he told Sarah what he did. Then they came down to my room and apologized to me. I told them their apology was accepted and that they have NO IDEA what their dad has to go through just to be able to see them and how EXCITED he is just before they get here and how depressed he is when they leave.

At approx noon or so, their mother called for the kids and Keith answered the phone. He gave the phone to his daughter and she spoke to first. Then, apparently the ex asked to speak to Keith and he ended up hanging up on her AGAIN, and she immediately called back. Keith answered and she spoke to her son.

Keith had told me that his son had been given a painkiller just before his procedure to relax him.

June 22nd-I have not really spoken to the kids since Tuesday, the 20th. I HATE LIVING LIKE THIS! I hate walking on egg shells because stepson may be in a bad mood! I told Keith that I cannot bring myself to “act happy” when I am CLEARLY and OBVIOUSLY am not. The kids accused me with A LOT of some stupid things that were not true and they would not listen to anything different. IT was not fair! EVERYTHING they have said, the EX has said to us first. They are just parroting HER.

Keith took his son, Sarah, Thomas and Sarah’s friend to the pool for awhile. His daughter stayed because she was not feeling well. She came down to my room and asked if she could use the phone. To call her mom?? I guess we will find out when the phone bill comes.

Keith came back about 1.5 hours later and told me that his daughter had thrown up. I told him she never said anything to me that if she could come and ask me to use the phone, she could have told me then she was not feeling well and I could have given her some Sprite or something and bread or whatever kind of crackers we had, until I went to the store when Keith came back.

After she threw up, Keith made her some lunch of fish sticks and she ate those!

At about 3pm I told Keith that I wanted to speak to the kids and them them why I was not speaking to them. We all sat down and I told them I was sorry for not talking to them for the last day and a half or so but that I was and am very upset that they accused me of things that were not true and about things they should no NOTHING about. I told them that it makes NO sense that I am the cause of their mother’s impending divorce, how can I be when I live 1500-1800 miles away! How much sense does that make? I told them that when I asked stepson if (his stepdad) and the ex were divorced yet and he yelled at me that it was none of my business I said, “That is RIGHT. It is none of my business, just like it is none of yours and CERTAINLY not your place to tell Sarah that his is NOT her brother since is NOT aware of that.” He understood. I also told him that I knew it hurt him when I said their mom is on medication for (medical condition) but I did not make that up, that SHE called ME and told me and if they ever want to hear it, let me know and I will play the recording for them. I asked them how would I know this if she did not tell me?! They had no answer.

I told them that for the last 6 years all I have done was try and make them feel welcomed and comfortable and part of our family here. I thought things were going well until Tuesday night. I asked if they meant it when they said they did not like me or Sarah or Thomas (their half brother) and they BOTH said it was just something they said at the time. I asked them if there was anything they would change if they could when they are here, they said, “No everything is fine.” I asked if we were too happy for the, if we didn’t fight enough for them if we asked too much of them, what? and they BOTH said they wouldn’t change anything. I told them that I miss not talking to them IN OUR HOME and that when stepdaughter and I go somewhere crazy things happen. She just chuckled.

We told them that if there is anything that we do not like , to let us know RIGHT AWAY so we can talk about it instead of having another episode like Tuesday night. We told them that whatever they do or think DOES concern Keith because he is their father and he loves them and wants to know what’s going on with them. If they do not tell him… we will never know. They said OK.

All in all it was a good talk. I think we did well in speaking to them at least opened the lines of communication a little more. It is OBVIOUS by the things that stepson had said before about things being NONE of Keith’s concerns all stems from his mother.

June 27th- Me, stepdaughter and Thomas took the girls, Sarah and Kaila to swimming lessons. Then we had to go to the post office. We saw Keith behind the North Station and talked to him. Then we went to get some McDonalds for lunch and brought it home.

Nick stayed behind and laid out by the pool.

There were 2 messages that were left from their mom. One was from 1130am and the other was from 1150am. She said she needs to speak to the kids. When I picked them up when I got home, I immediately told stepdaughter to call her mom. Poor thing didn’t even eat her lunch first! I asked if everything was alright with her mom and stepdaughter said everything was fine.

I am now (132pm) getting ready to take the kids to the pool.

Left the pool about 3pm. Keith got home around 4pm and took the kids back to the pool. While they were there, I just relaxed….AAHHHHH!

I told stepdaughter that while stepson was tanning tomorrow, I would get her nails done for her birthday. She wanted to get acrylics but I told her she HAD to call her mom and ask because I wasn’t going to get into trouble for it.

She did call her mom and her mom called back approx 9pm. I asked stepdaughter what the verdict was and she said that she could BUT it “it ruins your nails and other stuff” and so maybe she will get a “French thing.” I asked her if her nails were long enough and she said yes. We will see. Maybe a manicure or something…I guess we will see.

June 28th- Took stepdaughter to get a French manicure for her fingers and a regular pedicure. She enjoyed it. IT cost $18.00. she did not get tips put on her fingernails. They just did a French tip on her nail itself. It came out good. She called her mom around 830pm to tell her. Stepson went to use his suntan certificate Keith gave him at Christmas. He looks darker!

Stepdaughter will be starting HIP HOP DANCE tomorrow with the girls. Hopefully she will enjoy herself!

June 29th- The girls seem to have enjoyed their dance class, even stepdaughter. Keith was off at 230pm today and he met us at the class. We then went to Walmart and got stepson a game called “The Sims” and a couple CD’s and we got stepdaughter a couple cd’s as well.

June 30th- Took the kids to the pool today at 1130am. We stayed for about 2 hours then came home and ate some lunch and relaxed. Keith said he will take the kids back when he gets home from work.

July 3rd- We took the kids to see fireworks at Thompson Park. They said they enjoyed it.

July 4th- We went to the beach in the morning and left around 2pm. We came home and got ready to go to the Elks lodge for a bbq there as Ed’s guests. After that, we went to Michele’s for a bbq and fireworks. The kids said they enjoyed themselves.

July 5th- Keith worked today.

July 6th-Keith had to work today.

July 7th- Verified insurance cov for the kids. Spencer also called about 11am. I asked for a # for stepdaughter to call him back (stepson was at the pool) and he asked Amanda (Keith’s oldest daughter) what the number was and then came back and said, “we are leaving” so I told him that I would have stepdaughter leave a voicemail on his mom’s phone. Stepdaughter called back at 1120am. Stepson is at the pool by himself. Keith starts his vacation this evening. He is taking us for Chinese food tonight. He also said the kids could cut his hair tonight….FINALLY!!! LOL!

July 8th- We went to Hollywood today. Went to Gauman’s Chinese Theater, to Ripleys Believe it or Not, and Hollywood Wax Museum. It was fun. Then we went to Tommy’s for dinner.

July 9th- We went to Walmart to go shopping then to Betty’s gravesite and then to my Mom’s. Spenser called and wanted to come over so stepdaughter and I went to get him then went to the mall real quick. Just bought Keith NO DOUBT (cd).

July 10th- We went to the beach today. We started off at Sunset then found out by the LIFEGUARDS that there were stingrays in the water so stepdaughter and Kaila had to get out. We went to Huntington instead and had a good time.

On the way home, we stopped by and picked up Spenser. He called and wanted to stay the night. Him and stepson played “THE SIMS” all night.

July 11th- We went to South Coast Plaza. WHAT A HUGE MALL!! It was neat though. Bought stepson 2 cd’s and a Britney Spears magnet. Then we went to Block busters and rented Scream 3 and Sleepy Hollow. Stayed up until after midnight watching both! Spenser stayed the night.

July 12th- We didn’t do anything today. We were going to go to the beach but stepdaughter was pretty wiped out, stepson didn’t wake up until 11am and I didn’t get up until 1020am.

Keith took the kids swimming for a could hours. they had fun.

Around 2pm the ex called to speak to the kids. she did just that. I think she called just a couple minutes before that, and I could not hear her and Keith answered as well so I hung up and then he did to, thinking I was through talking to whomever it was. She called back immediately and spoke louder and asked to speak to the kids. I told stepson to tell her I was sorry for hanging up on her, but he didn’t because “she didn’t mention it” is what his reason was.

Jennifer came around 5 pm to pick up the kids to go to SPEEDWAY, a place across from the Puente Hills Mall where you drive the cars yourself and race other people. She said it is a lot of fun. That is good so they don’t get bored.

Spenser called and wanted to stay the night again, but Keith told him no because the kids won’t be back until 10pm or so.

July 13th- Keith took the kids swimming this morning and I went to the store. The girls had their dance lesson today. Stepdaughter seems not too interested anymore. After that, we went to get Keith’s new glasses and my contacts. Spenser came over, ex wife #1 dropped him off. We have to take him to camp in the morning.

July 14th- went to the beach today.

July 15th-17th-we left for Big Bear this morning, the 15th. We went to the high school as our first stop because brother in law’s team was having a tournament. Then we left there and went shopping in the Village. Stopped and niece at her job, and as we were walking, we saw Frank and Lydia from Church. We went back to Brother in laws house where he was bbq-ing.

on the 16th, we just kind of vegged. Dad and Keith went to the store. (bbq again) and brother in law and kids went to the video store to rent a couple dvd’s. We watched 3 kings and the Thomas Crown affair. Both great movies.

We also went on a long hike in an Indian trail brother in law took us on. That was FUN! It was at least a mile.

On the 17th we left around 930am. Dad drove us in his car. We went to breakfast and then out of town. We stopped by the cemetery to see Mom. Then Dad left and headed back up the hill and we went home.

It was a fun weekend.

July 18th- We spent the day at the beach, had to be careful because of the jellyfish out.

July 19th- Stepdaughter went with me to take Thomas to the doctors to have his right ear checked. His tube came out. The doc said he was fine.

We went to the circus tonight. I KNOW Sarah and Thomas had a good time, and stepson and stepdaughter said they did too, although they did say it was not a big deal, like it was something they do all the time.

July 20th- Tonight I am taking stepson and stepdaughter to Jens house and they are going to play LASER tag in Fullerton. Jen will bring them home.

It is 1133pm and the kids just got home about 10 minutes ago. They had fun at Laser tag and then they went bowling!!

Jen said she may go to the fair with us tomorrow. I hope so!

July 21st- Went to the OC fair. Got there around 1130am, and left at 930pm. Had a great time!

July 22nd- Kids grandma arrived around 1pm. we ordered pizza and talked. They left at 330pm/ It was good to see them. Thomas threw a FIT when they left with the kids! He wanted his “GUY” and “NEEK” he was screaming and crying and reaching out for them, and throwing his head back, it was real dramatic and sad.

Stepdaughter called around 7:00pm and left a message. They had gotten to their grandma’s fine.

They are staying with her in an unfinished 14ft x 8 ft add on.

July 23rd- Stepdaughter called around 830am said they were getting ready to go to the beach. Keith called her back around 9am.

July 24th- called the kids doc. He said the benzo-diazapene is a pain reducer. it is kind of like Valium but gets out of the the system faster. It’s a muscle relaxer. It does not stop the pain but it reduces the emotional response to paid. He said it reduces inhibitions and gives and amnesia type response, that one may not remember what they have done or said. Exactly how stepson described how he felt.

August 12th- Stepdaughter emailed Keith and said they are “home at last.”