Well, my daughters biological father died. I got word today. His sister called me. He died on Monday, 7/24/23. I’m shocked and saddened.
I’m sitting here thinking how Anthony was in Sarahs life from 0-7
months old. Then Keith raised Sarah from the time she was 10 months old until she was 12 years old, as his own, and caught a lot of shit for it from his ex wife #2. (That’s another story and I digress). Then of course, Kai stepped up.
I never spoke bad about Anthony to Sarah. There was no need to. Even though I had sole legal and sole physical custody of her, and he had no rights of visitation due to his issues, I always told him to let me know if and when he wanted to see her and I’d make arrangements, including a 3rd party. The offer was never taken. He didn’t want me or a third party present.
A few months after Keith died, I called Anthony and told him what happened and how it would be great and a perfect time for him to step up to the plate. He said ok, told me about his ex wife passing away, but again, nothing.
Sarah went with me to court so she could meet him at one point in time. He didn’t show up. She and I drove by his house in Lakewood because she was curious about him. She didn’t want to stop. I wasn’t going to force her.
I would send him pics of her every year, most of the time around her birthday. No response.
In Dec 2016 he sent me a text that said, “Patty you tell my daughter to contact me anytime I don’t need to speak to you to see her. Patty in the past you never let me see Sarah so I will talk to her but I have nothing to say to you I rest my case.”
She will be 30 this Tuesday and she never met him, though not because SHE didn’t try. This is not to bad mouth him either. He had his issues. His sister told me that over the last couple of years, he turned over a new leaf. I was happy for him. She also told me that he had told her he loved Sarah and hoped to have a relationship with her.
My daughter is sad that there is no longer an opportunity for her to meet him. That saddens me also. There’s no hard feelings, and she is not going to feel guilty about anything. There were never any cross words spoken between them. I would sign our names to a Christmas cards, I had always sent him job leads when I knew he was out of work, pics
Of Sarah, etc. I was also tough on him in the sense that while he thought he could just ignore his 3rd child, he had a responsibility to her. Hell, I even defended him to Keith’s ex, when she wrote bold face lies about him, but I digress. (It’s all on my blog anyway.)
I was also thinking how I have two kids with 2 biological fathers both who are now gone. That saddens me as well.
Since Sarah will be 30 on 8/1, here is the last pic I would have have sent him, via messenger, whether he saw it or not.
I really was always hopeful.
~This Is My World~ 