Author: Patricia

Today, April 15, 1998, Keith signed Court papers his attorney drew up. He requested one half (1/2) of Summer vacation, Every Spring, Every Fathers Day weekend and the children’s birthday weekend in even years, from Friday to Sunday, 2 weeks at Christmas and alternating Major holidays. He requested other orders as well.

Bought N a pair of shorts and a shirt from Mr. Rags today.

Anthony called earlier. Tomorrow is his birthday. He wants to set up a payment arrangement.

I told him to let me know if he wants to see our daughter.

Anthony sent me a $20 payment towards his share of uncovered medical. I’m shocked, pleasantly surprised and thankful. Got it today.

This letter was postmarked 3/17/1998. He received it on 3/20/98.

Keith was not agreeable to the visitations she set. They live 1200 miles away and the visitation schedule was peanuts.

In this latest letter she wrote, “Summer vacation 4 weeks from July 11- August 8th, 1998. If there is a problem with this as you stated in your letter please take me to court and let a third party decide. (The kids) do not want to stay at home every day with Patricia and the babies while you are at work. They kids want to spend their visitation with you not sitting at home while you work. Winter- December 26 to January 2nd- if you persist with your non agreement, the only other alternative is not to go at all. Weekends and in state visitations I offered one week in June because the kids like to visit you in shorter intervals and that was their request. This expense is not an issue with me as it is with you.”

Keith took her at her word. He decided to take her to court and let a third party decide the visitation.

I spoke to Anthony’s employer on 2/27/98 to verify eligibility for Sarah and was informed that she is covered under his policy.

On 3/19/98, I called his Health Plan and his employer and was told that in fact, there is NO such coverage on our daughter, but only for himself, his wife and her son. Remember, Anthony was court ordered on 12/5/95 to carry insurance on her.

HIS insurance is PRIMARY, there is no out of pocket costs to him. His employer pays 100%.

I reminded him he needed to take care of this and his Dental plan immediately. I also reminded him that my husband carries insurance coverage on our daughter as extra protection.

I ALSO sent a copy of the letter I wrote Anthony, to the DA’s office, requesting they take the necessary steps to ENFORCE the Health Insurance coverage order.

Anthony and I came to an agreement for him to pay his share of uncovered medical expenses. He owes $224.39. I don’t care about the change.

He agreed to $20 a month, starting April 1, 1998 and continuing on the first of every month, with his last payment being on March 1, 1999 in the amount of $24.39.

I told him if he pays cash, I’d provide a receipt. I also thanked him for being in compliance with the court order.

Sent the kids cards and Valentines Day presents today. Keith and I both signed each card.

Letter from the ex (he received 1/29/98) she wrote: “Letter dated January 7, 1998 from Patricia states the following, “I called our insurance company to verify coverage only to find out were are not showing up in the system as of yet. Both (insurance companies) advised me to send you a copy of the enrollment form so that when you take the kids to the doctor you can show your providers the form as proof of eligibility. Things should be find showing the form. Letter dated January 20, 1998 from Patricia states the following” I hope you haven’t experienced too much trouble with the medical end.”

Yep, that’s what I wrote her.

Then she commented ” Is your theory on being stepparents your own, because (their kids) would disagree they answer to only one set of parents? They respect (her husband) because he has been there for them on more than one occasion. And because that respect has been given and earned between them. It has nothing to do with you marry. Respect is earned not just given.”

HER disrespect to both Keith and I play a MAJOR roll in how the kids treat us.

Keith wrote a letter telling his ex that there is medical coverage on the kids and that it has been effective since 1/1/98. He told her she was sent the information and given the information on her answering machine on January 7th. He went on to say that in lieu of any cards until he receives them, she was told that upon presentation of the information provided to her, there would no problem with benefits being paid. She really has no idea? She really doesn’t pay attention to what is sent to her or told to her? OH wait, she only pays attention to “certain” things. 😉

He also told her that just as I am not the kids “mom,” her husband is not the kids “father” but being stepparents, we share an equal amount of authority and deserve equal amounts of respect as he and she gets being their parents.