~This Is My World~

L wrote to her friend, on her public social media, about her mom…”oh yeah, shes engaged…surpise..lol.. no not really but yeah..”

Saw this on my former stepdaughter’s PUBLIC myspace to her friend-

I HOPE her mother did something about this. More proof of things Keith and I were accused of is exactly what’s happening in the PNW.

Wrote oldest stepdaughter. “I am currently going through cards and letters to my deceased husband, Keith D, and came across some that were sent from you. Would you like them back? If not, I will be throwing them away. Please advise by email. Thank you.

Respectfully,
Patricia

Filed with the Court on 5/22/06- Received a copy today, August 3, 2006.

Anthony is done paying arrears, so child support goes down to $607 a month.

somewhat of what it will be like when I clean out my husbands things. Late yesterday afternoon, I decided to look for a drawer my landlord was inquiring about that he needed to fix. I had told him a little while ago that the drawer was in the garage, and I would look through my husbands things and find it.

Well, all I did was move things around, and it hit me, I was looking through my husbands things and I started to cry. I was glad my kids weren’t there to see me, but I cried and asked my husband where this drawer was (which I did receive and answer for – my landlord has it, and he seems to have forgotten he does) and I also told my husband that we never discussed what was to be done with his tools, etc should something happen to him.

It’s 7 months this month, and all his clothes are still hanging up, his clothes are still in his dresser drawers, with the exception of some of his t-shirts that my daughter likes to wear, and the bag that I got from this hospital is still where I put it, nearly 7 months ago. To clean out his things is going to be extremely hard, I can see that already. I know it is just something I have to do. Today, my neighbor is going to come over and take down some boxes off a shelf in the garage. I am not fond of heights and ladders and she is fine with both, so she said she would help. I don’t think going through those boxes will affect me like the other stuff. The boxes have been ‘stored’ since we moved in this house, in 2002. Depending on the contents, I have a couple different options as to what to do with the stuff.

June 1st, my son had a break down. He was practicing the song, “Proud to be an American” by Lee Greenwood, for his program later this week at school, and after the song, he just sat on his knees, put his hands to his eyes and burst into tears. He was shaking terribly and I just held him and told him it was ok. He kept saying, “When we would go to sleep at night, daddy would always say he would never leave me” I tried to explain to him that while his daddy wasn’t here physically, he would always be in his heart, and with him always that way. It seemed to have brought some comfort to him. After his breakdown, I went to my room and had my own. Thank GOD one of my earth angels was available, and we talked for several hours.

On June 2nd, I had another dream that my husband was alive, and I think it was his and God’s way of letting me know that my husband is fine, and I need to be fine, and that while my husband isn’t here physically with me, he is here in Spirit with me and my kids, always.

Seems the perfect family life J tried to portray isn’t exactly as it was.

This morning, at 9:02am, L wrote her friend on her public social media, that her “mom doesn’t seemed to thrilled to come get me.. so shes definitly buying me a car over the summer so she deosnt have to I guess..whatever…”

At 12:55 pm L wrote a male friend of hers that shes’s stressing out casue of all this shot and that I just want to go home.. but then again I dont want to go home casue I know I’ll be stressed casue of my mom thing but whatever about that…”

How sad. So my former stepdaughter is now almost 20 years old. She wrote on her public MySpace about her mother’s engagement. Maybe it should be reengagement to ex hubby #2. ANYWAY, she told her friend that she spoke to her mom for a few hours about “the engagement thing” but even though she’s just going with the flow, she is pissed at her mom because she knows how she (her mom) is going to be and that she just understand her and she (stepdaughter) hates it. She said she tries her hardest to show that she cares for her mom. WTH? Dad dies and the things she and her mom accused her dad of, not knowing his daughter (or son) is actually what is going on with her mother? Hmmmm…. ANYWAY…

Former Stepdaughter continues, “yet, she yelled at me and said, LET ME LIVE MY LIFE and it made me cry then she was like I have spent over 20 years taking care of you and (former stepson) and now it’s my turn to live my life how I want it and that’s what is going to happen” She wrote how she was so mad and that she knows this “engagedment married thing is not going to work I just know it”

She goes on to say, “right now I just want to run awya from all the stress and just live on my own with out worrying about everyone cause it seems like no one wants me to worry about them…but I just have to thats just me…I love the poeple around me and they always shut me down…I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

She also wrote, “…oh yeah its likei lost one parent why do i have to lose another i mean I try.. what the hell am i supposed to do.. i hate it..”

That just makes me SAD, because HER DAD LOVED HER and wanted her around and she shut HIM out and shut HIM down, and then he died.

Is this her Karma?

She also wrote, later on that she knows it “probably wont work out for my mom and I know Ill be there when it doesnt…”

Isn’t this LOVELY…. Can’t say this ISN’T directed towards me. I printed this today.

From L’s friend “Steve”

Amanda and her half sister L are so caught up on their hate for ME, that they care not one ounce about their half brother, my son, who is 8. It’s ok though, as he most CERTAINLY doesn’t need that toxicity in his life. I didn’t add Amanda’s oldest brother or her L’s older brother because I haven’t heard from them…yet 😉

Regardless of Amanda’s older brother’s feelings for me, and I really don’t know what they are as he has never told me, but I have to say he has ALWAYS been very cordial to me, always had a pleasant, “Hi Patty, how ya doing,” shake my hand, really nice guy to my face. IF he is one way to my face and another behind my back, then that’s on him, but he has never shown ME one ounce of disrespect at any time. Even in his response to my text message on his birthday (he shares a birthday with my husband) he was kind. I haven’t spoke to him since… shrug. NOT a big deal. I respect him a lot.

Amanda seems to have issues with me that I didn’t know about until last year. What I DO know, is that while she calls me meddling, she has struggled with her relationship with her dad, WELL before I came into the picture. My husband I didn’t interact THAT much with his two oldest kids, and Amanda admitted it had nothing to do with me, even though she wants people to believe it did, but whatever.

Their dad is dead, gone. Amanda wrote her dad off once again, ( I lost count how many times that happened) sometime last year when she was giving him shit about his relationship with L. Amanda’s own relationship with L and N admittedly was not stellar and she really had no place to make bones about my husband’s relationship with them.

I will say this though, Keith loved his kids, but HE decided not to put up with their bullshit and emotional rollercoaster they had him on and the GAMES they played with him.

L started telling her dad sometime in 2003 to stay out of her life, to quit contacting her, no phone calls, no text, NOTHING. It was then she started to refer to him by his first and/ or middle name. The straw that broke the camels back and probably Keith heart was on Oct. 11, 2005 when she told him to FUCK OFF, and told him she hated him and to stay out of her life, that she didn’t need him in her life and she could make it through her life without him.

THEIR CHOICES, THEIR GUILT feelings are where I believe all their animosity is coming from. THEY need to put blame WHERE it lies, and THEY need to accept responsibility for THEIR OWN decisions to try and not have a better relationship with their dad. It truly IS THEIR LOSS, for my two children and I KNOW what a wonderful man their father was, and what a caring father he was.

I started nothing. I didn’t even believe what Keith told me about you. I kept thinking “SURELY, it can’t be THAT BAD….” Until I saw it for myself.

What is it that you say I knew nothing about? I gave you the benefit of the doubt, until I couldn’t any longer. I saw the lies, from visitation to demanding money, to screwing around with the insurance companies and claims and not billing properly. I saw it all.

I’m just standing up and proving that YOU are the biggest liar I have ever seen. It’s SHOCKING how much you lie. It’s even more shocking that you work with the public and that you were or still are, not sure which, the president of the Kiwanis Club, while trashing my kids. UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE. Truly.

When your daughter responded to me the way she did, it’s all she deserved, especially after telling her dad to fuck off.

Your parenting with Keith was NOT perfect. I read the letters you wrote to him, after you told him to leave. You would write things like, “Sorry we still don’t agree on everything…” or “I know the last letter I wrote you was mean but…” or like I wrote earlier, you said, “We can’t even write to each other without fighting.” Your perception of “Perfect” is VERY much SKEWED.

I wasn’t with Keith when his son was 5, LOL didn’t even know him. You can say anything you want now, now that Keith is dead and can’t speak. It seems in Sept. 1989 was when his son turned 5, and Keith had left in August of 1989, a month before. In all the letters you wrote Keith since he left, you never once mentioned how he never showed up for his son’s 5th birthday. Wonder why that is…. not one mention. Knowing you like I do, I suspect this one goes in that LIES BY J file too.

You want to harp on what Keith didn’t do for his son’s high school graduation in 2002, (no seniority) but you don’t say ONE thing about what YOU didn’t do. When Keith told you he couldn’t get the time off, you never ONCE understood, nor did ever offer to record it and send Keith a copy. You didn’t offer to pay for his airfare to get there, didn’t offer to pay for a rental car, nothing. Not only that, but at one time, YOU told Keith that your then husband would be more than happy to adopt Keith’s kids as his own. Your own daughter once told Keith that your husband was more of a father to her because he was always there. Things planted in your kids minds by you. YOU are the one that said Keith makes you hate him more and more. I’m sure your kids heard that many times considering the things they would say to him.

Not one phone call for years huh? Funny, we have phone bills showing calls to your home phone. SO MANY TIMES, he had to leave a message and didn’t get a return call. Makes me wonder if the kids even HEARD the messages or received them.

What problems did I cause for Keith’s dad, and his oldest son and daughter? You’re so funny, thinking you know everything, LMAO. Funny how you accuse me of butting in, but here you are, just as you have ALWAYS done. Whenever the kids would go back home after visiting their dad, you’d PEPPER them with questions and GRILL them for answers and then send an email to Keith giving him shit over something that did or did not take place here, in our home, 1200 miles away from YOU.

The money you got was to offset the crap I was constantly pulling? Funny, because the money you got was always LESS than what you felt you should have gotten. You always wanted more than $1000. You never got it. The most you got was $800 and part of that was for Child Care you said the kids were going to, and once you got THAT support order, suddenly, the kids didn’t need to go to child care. We ALWAYS provided proof of your shenanigans and lies about visitation, all medical/dental expenses, and messing with visitation and I believe that is why you never got the amount of support you thought you needed.

What did I do when Keith and I and our kids lived “in the trailer on Rosecrans.” This should be good. LOL. Why did we have to move? We didn’t have to move. Keith found a 3 bedroom/2 bath house for us in a city that he wanted our kids to go to school in. Your point? OH there is none. LOL.

YOU know nothing. You just like to THINK you do, because YOU are jealous and spiteful and HATE that Keith was HAPPY…WITHOUT YOU.